


Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid

by angstytimelord



Category: Actor RPF, Hannibal (TV) RPF
Genre: M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-09
Updated: 2014-09-09
Packaged: 2018-02-16 18:58:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2280996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstytimelord/pseuds/angstytimelord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mads finds it impossible to tell Hugh exactly how he feels about him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid

He wanted to shout out his feelings to the world every time he looked at Hugh.

But he could never do that, of course. He hid those feelings behind a mask of friendship, all the while wishing that the two of them could have more.

Every time Hugh spoke to him when they weren't rehearsing or filming a scene, he died a little inside, knowing that they could never have more than this, more than the friendship they now shared.

Mads wished with all of his heart and soul that there could be more, but he knew there couldn't be. Hugh might not be married any more, but that didn't mean that the two of them could suddenly fall all over each other. He didn't even know if Hugh thought of him in that way, or if he was interested in men at all.

It wasn't as though he had made his own preferences openly known, either. True, he liked both men _and_ women, but since his divorce, he hadn't dated a male. Not publicly, anyway.

Oh, he'd had a few relationships, but none of them had been anything special. No one had lived up to his vision of Hugh. He didn't really want anyone else, male or female.

Hugh Dancy had spoiled him for anyone else, and they had never even been together!

How could he make himself tell Hugh exactly how he felt? He didn't think he was capable of that; he would stumble over the words, his tongue tied in knots, unable to express how he truly felt.

There was no way to put his feelings into words. They were something that he kept private, close to his heart, never letting anyone know that those emotions even existed.

Least of all could he let Hugh know about those feelings; a part of him felt that he way betraying their friendship and Hugh's trust in him by even harboring romantic ideas about the other man. He didn't think that Hugh would reject his friendship, or push him away, but he didn't want to take that risk.

Mads sighed softly, watching as Hugh blocked a scene with the director of the episode they were filming, his gaze traveling over the other man's body, finally coming to rest on his face.

Hugh was so beautiful, he thought wistfully. Even with the stubble, he had the face of an angel come to earth, an angel who had stolen Mads' heart from the moment they had first met.

Hugh was even more desirable now than he had been ten years ago.  
Mads could still remember that long-ago day when they had first met on the set of _King Arthur_ , the fluttering of his heart when Hugh had first shaken his hand and smiled at him.

He had wanted Hugh then, too. Those blue eyes, those perfect lips, that porcelain skin, those dark curls. He had been so gorgeous, so utterly desirable, that Mads' heart had pounded so hard he was sure that everyone around them could hear it. He had wondered if it was possible for his heart to jump out of his chest.

Of course, it hadn't -- but from that moment on, that heart had been beating only for Hugh. Even when they hadn't seen each other for a very long time, he still thought of the young man with desire.

But was it only desire? Or was it more than that? Perhaps it had started out as mere desire, but his emotions had grown in the years that they had known each other.

Mads knew that he was in love with Hugh, and that the love he felt would never fade away and never die. It had grown to the point where Hugh was nestled deep within his heart, and he knew that the younger man would always be there. It was pointless trying to fool himself into believing that they were only friends.

Though from Hugh's point of view, that was all they were. Mads sighed again, forcing himself to look away, not wanting his heart to be revealed in his gaze.

Something things were better left unsaid. He could never tell Hugh how he felt.

If he did, then he risked damaging their friendship, and that was far too precious for him to risk. He didn't want to lose Hugh as a friend, not if it was the only relationship that they could have.

But if they could have more .... For a few moments, Mads allowed himself to dream of what the future could be like with Hugh by his side, not only as his friend, but as his partner.

He would never have to spend another night alone, wondering how it would feel to hold Hugh in his arms .He would be able to love the younger man, to kiss him, to touch him, to make love to him. It was all he had ever wanted, from the first time Hugh had smiled at him and his heart had turned somersaults.

But he couldn't have that, and he knew it. He didn't want to risk their friendship crumbling to the ground by trying to find out if there could be anything more.

He had to be satisfied with the way things were. He had no other choice.

Maybe there would come a day when he could tell Hugh how he felt -- and, miracle of miracles, the other man just might return those emotions, and make him the happiest man in the universe.

But until then, some things were definitely better left unsaid, as he couldn't be sure of what sort of reception his feelings would get. He would have to wait a while longer to determined that.

One day, he was sure that he _would_ let Hugh know how he felt -- if he felt that there was any chance at all of his feelings being reciprocated. But until then, he would keep them under wraps. It wouldn't be easy, not when they worked so closely together, but again, Mads didn't feel that he had much choice in the matter.

They were working together on a daily basis now. They had time to let themselves get to know each other better -- and to let their feelings for each other grow and develop.

He would have time to let his feelings for Hugh flower -- and hopefully, the same emotions would grow within Hugh's heart. Maybe, one day in the future, he would be able to have his heart's desire.

But until then, he would have to be patient, and content himself with what he already had.


End file.
